The date isn't exactly right, but two years ago, on the Friday of Labor Day Weekend, I made my first call to my adoption agency. Although I didn't know it at the time, that call started my journey to Owen.
I have off on Fridays in the summer, so in 2006 I was using my Fridays to do adoption research. I had contacted a bunch of agencies and received info packets or gone to open houses, when a Google search on "Vietnam adoption" turned up my future agency. I read about their Vietnam program -- Vietnam was on my list of potential countries, along with Guatemala and Taiwan -- and the agency looked good. So I gave them a call and had a great chat with the woman who would become my adoption social worker.
Two years ago, when I asked how long the wait was, she said they had waiting children at the orphanage. (This is an adoption term for children cleared for adoption when there aren't paperwork-ready parents to match them with; in general, the reserve is the case -- "waiting families" have paperwork ready and are hoping for children to enter orphanages and be cleared for adoption.) After hearing nothing but lengthy waits from every agency I'd called, to think that they had kids waiting for their new families was very encouraging.
Of course, we all know how it turned out. Nothing in international adoption is predictable, and I ended up waiting...and waiting...and waiting. But darn, was it worth it, because I got the kid I was supposed to get.
When I called my future agency, Owen's birth mother was in the final weeks of her pregnancy. It sometimes blows my mind to think of how all the planets aligned.
So two years after making that phone call, here I am, watching Owen and Ray nap on the couch and thinking I'm just about the luckiest person in the world. And that's after this morning, when Owen jammed a fork in the side of a Barq's root beer can and made a "fountain" in the kitchen.
On some not so happy news, my anniversary runs up against September 1, a sad day for many folks, as it's the day that US-Vietnam adoptions are suspended till further notice. I'm still on the waiting families email list from my agency -- they're a little slow to clean up their lists -- and from a message I received a few weeks ago, it looked like they didn't expect to make any more referrals before Sept. 1. (The US-VN agreement said that as long as you had a referral of a child by Sept. 1, you could finish your adoption, but if you didn't have a referral, your paperwork would be returned to you, good night and good luck.) My agency said waiting families could either wait out a new Vietnam-US agreement (no idea how long that will be -- the last time was a couple years), or consider switching to their Russian program.
Changing countries isn't that simple. You have to do new paperwork, pay new fees, and take your place in a new line. It's of course an option, but I really feel for the families that didn't make the deadline -- more delays, more expense, having to get your head around a different way of building your family than you'd planned.
I don't doubt that there are problems with Vietnam adoption (documented here), but not all agencies and orphanages are involved in corrupt practices, and it's so sad that the bad apples are spoiling it for those that conduct their adoptions ethically. And it's sad that months after the US Embassy report, the US government and Vietnam couldn't come to an agreement to let some adoption agencies continue to operate. We saw so many beautiful children at the orphanage and they all deserve permanent homes. And we've met some of our agency's waiting families who were far back on the line compared to us.
So I'm taking some time today to remember that phone call two years ago and be thankful that I made it when I did, and that I'm where I am today: lucky, lucky, lucky beyond words.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
Owen's Wild Weekend
Owen had a huge weekend, and I think he's still recovering. He kicked off the weekend on Friday with lunch with Aunt Roberta. They did a little window shopping in Bethesda while she held him.
Then after a nap it was off to dinner with Aunt Mary Ellen at a Vietnamese restaurant in Arlington, where Owen surprised us all by picking up chopsticks and eating his pork and vermicelli.
Then Saturday was the big day at my parents' house, meeting a lot of his extended family and some family friends.
He went full-throttle from noon to 9 p.m. -- no nap, no even sitting down for a few moments. He got on the trampoline, sat on a bike while people took turns pushing him around, got in the sandbox, got a haircut from Aunt Gail while the camera flashbulbs popped, and chowed down on all the food his relatives kept stuffing in his mouth -- basically the contents of an entire fruit basket throughout the day and a whole chicken, topping it off with a bowl of ice cream. He even got on Renee's mini John Deere Gator and took off by putting his foot on the pedal without knowing what was going to happen. Renee rode him around after that, and he loved it.
So his introduction to the Smith Family was a roaring success. He was utterly charming and social on Saturday. There were about 30 people at my parents' house, and he did great with so many new faces. He even let a few people hold him. He's doing great in crowds, although he did bite Mommy once -- biting is still an issue.
He got some Ravens gear from Aunt Melinda and an Air Force shirt from Aunt Gail, so he's very decked out now.
On Sunday, it was back to my parents' house for a more low-key day with Aunt Gail before she headed back to NC. He played in his new sandbox (although we filled it with water), ate a lot of rock fish for lunch, picked apples and pears with his grandparents, and added a new skill -- throwing a ball for a dog to retrieve at friends of my parents' house.
He's really doing great with new people, although he's quick to turn on the waterworks and show us all of his teeth (screaming) when he doesn't get his way. It's hard to tell if this is typical 2-year-old behavior or if it's part of the transition -- he's had so little control over his environment in the last month, so he gets frustrated easily. And he still carries around comfort items -- usually a plastic fork and spoon.
But it's all going well. We're having a blast. He's mostly a very happy kid who wakes up with big smiles for his parents, and then goes full-throttle for the rest of the day.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Health Update -- Whew!
Good news today from the pediatrician. Owen's blood tests are back, and the tests that were done on him in Vietnam (Hep, HIV, etc.) were confirmed. All negative. And, it looks like he was vaccinated for polio and Hep B over there, and exposed to chicken pox. He's got some shots in his future -- including tetanus next week, which he is not going to be happy about -- but the doc says that otherwise he looks great. For now, a clean bill of health.
It's such a relief. I feel like I can relax a bit now.
In other news, he's had quite the social calendar this week. He celebrated Pop-Pop's birthday with lunch at Clyde's on Wednesday, dined atop Federal Hill yesterday, and had lunch with Aunt Roberta today. He's got a few more lunch and dinner dates on his calendar in the next few days.
But tomorrow is the big one -- his debut with the Smith Family. Aunt Gail will be visiting this weekend, so much of the Smith clan will be descending on my parents' house to meet the newest member. I know he's had some culture shock since he came to the U.S., but this will take the cake.
Just kidding....
I succeeded in signing him and me up for Aquatots starting in September. Geez, what a process. I waited three weeks for the online registration to open, but with my dad's birthday, forgot to log on until a little after 5 on Wednesday. So, I saw there were only 2 slots left for the time and day I wanted, added the class to my cart, then had to create an account with MontCo Parks & Rec. Fine. Except that the account comes with a PIN you need to complete any registration...and "you should receive it in 48 hours."
As someone who works on the Web, I will explain this in technical terms: Poor user experience! And it was after 5, so I couldn't call to try to expedite anything (aka complain). Instead we headed up to the local swim center to register in person, which the web site said was an option. I wanted one of those two remaining slots, dammit.
But ha ha, the swim center is closed all this week for maintenance! No walk-in registration for us!
Say it with me: Poor user experience!!
Luckily, I got the PIN the next day, and they still had a slot in the class for Owen. So, the second week in September, he and I will head off to the local swim center for some swimming instruction.
But shouldn't signing up have been easier? Maybe I should have sent them the link to the video of Owen and me in the pool in Hanoi. They'd see this kid is made for the water. And all the shots of my rack might have helped, too. ;)
It's such a relief. I feel like I can relax a bit now.
In other news, he's had quite the social calendar this week. He celebrated Pop-Pop's birthday with lunch at Clyde's on Wednesday, dined atop Federal Hill yesterday, and had lunch with Aunt Roberta today. He's got a few more lunch and dinner dates on his calendar in the next few days.
But tomorrow is the big one -- his debut with the Smith Family. Aunt Gail will be visiting this weekend, so much of the Smith clan will be descending on my parents' house to meet the newest member. I know he's had some culture shock since he came to the U.S., but this will take the cake.
Just kidding....
I succeeded in signing him and me up for Aquatots starting in September. Geez, what a process. I waited three weeks for the online registration to open, but with my dad's birthday, forgot to log on until a little after 5 on Wednesday. So, I saw there were only 2 slots left for the time and day I wanted, added the class to my cart, then had to create an account with MontCo Parks & Rec. Fine. Except that the account comes with a PIN you need to complete any registration...and "you should receive it in 48 hours."
As someone who works on the Web, I will explain this in technical terms: Poor user experience! And it was after 5, so I couldn't call to try to expedite anything (aka complain). Instead we headed up to the local swim center to register in person, which the web site said was an option. I wanted one of those two remaining slots, dammit.
But ha ha, the swim center is closed all this week for maintenance! No walk-in registration for us!
Say it with me: Poor user experience!!
Luckily, I got the PIN the next day, and they still had a slot in the class for Owen. So, the second week in September, he and I will head off to the local swim center for some swimming instruction.
But shouldn't signing up have been easier? Maybe I should have sent them the link to the video of Owen and me in the pool in Hanoi. They'd see this kid is made for the water. And all the shots of my rack might have helped, too. ;)
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
More on the Name and the Likes
Dad too thinks Owen is doing great. He certainly loves his Mom and jumps in her arms all of the time. I get my fair share as well. We have a very happy family.
As Bonnie mentioned (also here), we had a short list of American names and wanted to meet him before picking one. It wasn't like we walked into the orphanage and decided. His personality had to come out a bit and he had to become more attached to us. So in the days after the Giving and Receiving as he become more relaxed then he seemed like an Owen.
There is also a tradition in my family, my Dad says it is good Irish luck, to have initials that are a word. So my brothers and sisters are: PAD, LAD, DED, GMD, ADD and TAD. So Owen Loc Daly is right at home.
Owen likes remote controls of any sort. Like most households we have about a dozen and just got some more with the addition of FIOS for phone, tv and internet. So the remotes that we leave readily available are for equipment we don't use or have had their batteries removed. We're hoping that his favorite will be one from this group and not the Tivo.
He also likes our laptops. We've taught him to be more careful around these costly machines but he still likes to hit keys. So his first computer program, "Giggles Baby - ABC's and 123's", is a minor hit. He can see something happen on the screen because he hits a key. But expecting a "baby" to recognize that pressing the "G" key produces the letter "G" on the screen is a big stretch. A better program would be the "Baby Hit Any Key".
American fruit is also a big like for him. Owen will try almost any kind of food which is great. Though our notes from the orphanage said that he didn't like fruit, our experience is much different. In Vietnam he loved all of the dragon fruit, Vietnamese cherries and other local fruits we gave him. Coming home from the grocery story, he scarfed down blueberries, though he is less fond of them now. I think his favorite are seedless, white grapes. He smiles just pulling one out of the bunch. Fresh peaches have been all over his face. And sometimes watermelon. So glad he got to the States in August while all these fruits are in season.
We knew with ice cream that he likes sweets. So yesterday I snuck him two miniature oatmeal raisin cookies from the top of the fridge. Later in the day we are in another room of the house and he wanted to go out - the usual of tapping me on the chest and pointing. So I walk out of the room and put him down. Off he runs into the kitchen. He goes right to the fridge and points up. Mom wonders what he is pointing at. "Owen, do you want this kitchen magnet?" Nope. The secret was out and the smart little boy got a couple more cookies.
He'll probably wake up here in a few minutes, it is about 8:00 am, and want to go outside. So I better go get my shoes on.
As Bonnie mentioned (also here), we had a short list of American names and wanted to meet him before picking one. It wasn't like we walked into the orphanage and decided. His personality had to come out a bit and he had to become more attached to us. So in the days after the Giving and Receiving as he become more relaxed then he seemed like an Owen.
There is also a tradition in my family, my Dad says it is good Irish luck, to have initials that are a word. So my brothers and sisters are: PAD, LAD, DED, GMD, ADD and TAD. So Owen Loc Daly is right at home.
Owen likes remote controls of any sort. Like most households we have about a dozen and just got some more with the addition of FIOS for phone, tv and internet. So the remotes that we leave readily available are for equipment we don't use or have had their batteries removed. We're hoping that his favorite will be one from this group and not the Tivo.
He also likes our laptops. We've taught him to be more careful around these costly machines but he still likes to hit keys. So his first computer program, "Giggles Baby - ABC's and 123's", is a minor hit. He can see something happen on the screen because he hits a key. But expecting a "baby" to recognize that pressing the "G" key produces the letter "G" on the screen is a big stretch. A better program would be the "Baby Hit Any Key".
American fruit is also a big like for him. Owen will try almost any kind of food which is great. Though our notes from the orphanage said that he didn't like fruit, our experience is much different. In Vietnam he loved all of the dragon fruit, Vietnamese cherries and other local fruits we gave him. Coming home from the grocery story, he scarfed down blueberries, though he is less fond of them now. I think his favorite are seedless, white grapes. He smiles just pulling one out of the bunch. Fresh peaches have been all over his face. And sometimes watermelon. So glad he got to the States in August while all these fruits are in season.
We knew with ice cream that he likes sweets. So yesterday I snuck him two miniature oatmeal raisin cookies from the top of the fridge. Later in the day we are in another room of the house and he wanted to go out - the usual of tapping me on the chest and pointing. So I walk out of the room and put him down. Off he runs into the kitchen. He goes right to the fridge and points up. Mom wonders what he is pointing at. "Owen, do you want this kitchen magnet?" Nope. The secret was out and the smart little boy got a couple more cookies.
He'll probably wake up here in a few minutes, it is about 8:00 am, and want to go outside. So I better go get my shoes on.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Ow! Plus: The Trader Joe's Celebrity
Owen had his first pediatrician appointment today. He did really well. Okay, he cried a lot, but he was very cooperative during his exam, and considering he had three vials of blood drawn and three shots, he really weathered it like a champ. No need for the papoose during the needle portion -- we had a great nurse who drew blood with such skill that he never even flinched when the needle went in.
We'll get results next week. They're going to re-run all his known Vietnamese tests as well as check to see if he was ever immunized for anything. Then we'll know what we're dealing with and go from there. But the doctor, herself an adoptive mom who now specializes in adoption medicine, said he looked great. We're just keeping our fingers crossed on the bloodwork.
Then we went to Trader Joe's to stock up on provisions, and it was like we were back in Vietnam, drawing attention with our handsome little guy. We haven't gotten this kind of reaction at my local Giant, but we had a couple people come up to us and ooh and ahh over Owen and politely acknowledge our status as adoptive parents.
But it was kind of funny. Owen and Dad had selected a snack, some white cheddar "Buried Treasure" (cheese-flavored corn puffs), and Owen was holding the bag and trying to get into it when one of the admirers pulled her cart next to us.
She cooed over how adorable Owen is, but asked him archly, "What's that you've got there? That's not really a very healthy snack for you, you know."
WTF? We just smiled and nodded. Of course, I never think of anything to say at the moment, but I wish I'd said something like, "'Oh yeah, lady? Well, a couple weeks ago, he was eating food off a Vietnamese orphanage FLOOR, so let him have his damn cheesy puffs. Oh, and MYOB."
Trader Joe's Buried Treasure have no trans fats, only 1 g of sugar per serving, and 3 g of protein. And Owen scarfed them down on the ride home.
We'll get results next week. They're going to re-run all his known Vietnamese tests as well as check to see if he was ever immunized for anything. Then we'll know what we're dealing with and go from there. But the doctor, herself an adoptive mom who now specializes in adoption medicine, said he looked great. We're just keeping our fingers crossed on the bloodwork.
Then we went to Trader Joe's to stock up on provisions, and it was like we were back in Vietnam, drawing attention with our handsome little guy. We haven't gotten this kind of reaction at my local Giant, but we had a couple people come up to us and ooh and ahh over Owen and politely acknowledge our status as adoptive parents.
But it was kind of funny. Owen and Dad had selected a snack, some white cheddar "Buried Treasure" (cheese-flavored corn puffs), and Owen was holding the bag and trying to get into it when one of the admirers pulled her cart next to us.
She cooed over how adorable Owen is, but asked him archly, "What's that you've got there? That's not really a very healthy snack for you, you know."
WTF? We just smiled and nodded. Of course, I never think of anything to say at the moment, but I wish I'd said something like, "'Oh yeah, lady? Well, a couple weeks ago, he was eating food off a Vietnamese orphanage FLOOR, so let him have his damn cheesy puffs. Oh, and MYOB."
Trader Joe's Buried Treasure have no trans fats, only 1 g of sugar per serving, and 3 g of protein. And Owen scarfed them down on the ride home.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
More on the Name
I wanted to add some more about how we settled on "Owen" for Loc's American name. Actually, how I threw my support behind it after Ray and I narrowed down our choices to three or four names.
My sister and my nephew picked up on it right away, when I told them Loc would be called "Owen." They both said, "Oh, like Owen Meany," referencing John Irving's A Prayer for Owen Meany. They might not know it, but I share their fondness for this amazing book.
Indeed, there was a time when John Irving was my absolute favorite author. I've read Garp cover to cover maybe 5 or 6 times. I haven't liked much of his more recent work, and I've actually skipped the last few novels. I think Owen Meany was his last great novel.
I never set out to name my son after the ruined-voice, dwarfish Owen Meany. When Ray and I were paring down choices, we both liked Owen, but we had a few others we liked just as much.
But I ultimately gravitated to the name Owen because of the book, which I read many years ago, because it is about fate and faith -- two things that figure heavily in every adoption journey, adoptive parents will tell you. You have to have a lot of faith that you'll get through the process and find your child, because there's so much of it out of your control. As for fate -- everyone will say it's wild how it happens. Even though you go in order based on when your paperwork is done and when a child is available, you get the child you were supposed to get, in a cosmic sense, and once you meet him or her, you can't imagine any other child more perfect for you. It's fate, pure and simple, that brings you together.
And then there's the book's Vietnam angle. Owen is convinced his fate is to go to Vietnam. Okay, specifically, that he will die there, but let's not go into that. Let's just acknowledge that Vietnam looms large in the second half of the book.
Owen Meany uses my favorite narrative device -- at the end, all the loose threads come together, including something that seemed so unimportant -- "the Shot." You find out why the book included so many references to Johnny and Owen practicing "the Shot." And the book ends with Owen using "the Shot" to save a group of Vietnamese orphans.
So there you have it -- Vietnamese orphans, a feeling that one is destined to go to Vietnam, and poignant meditations on faith and fate. I didn't name Owen after Owen Meany, absolutely not, but I remembered the book after we put "Owen" on the short list, and it all just seemed to fit.
My sister and my nephew picked up on it right away, when I told them Loc would be called "Owen." They both said, "Oh, like Owen Meany," referencing John Irving's A Prayer for Owen Meany. They might not know it, but I share their fondness for this amazing book.
Indeed, there was a time when John Irving was my absolute favorite author. I've read Garp cover to cover maybe 5 or 6 times. I haven't liked much of his more recent work, and I've actually skipped the last few novels. I think Owen Meany was his last great novel.
I never set out to name my son after the ruined-voice, dwarfish Owen Meany. When Ray and I were paring down choices, we both liked Owen, but we had a few others we liked just as much.
But I ultimately gravitated to the name Owen because of the book, which I read many years ago, because it is about fate and faith -- two things that figure heavily in every adoption journey, adoptive parents will tell you. You have to have a lot of faith that you'll get through the process and find your child, because there's so much of it out of your control. As for fate -- everyone will say it's wild how it happens. Even though you go in order based on when your paperwork is done and when a child is available, you get the child you were supposed to get, in a cosmic sense, and once you meet him or her, you can't imagine any other child more perfect for you. It's fate, pure and simple, that brings you together.
And then there's the book's Vietnam angle. Owen is convinced his fate is to go to Vietnam. Okay, specifically, that he will die there, but let's not go into that. Let's just acknowledge that Vietnam looms large in the second half of the book.
Owen Meany uses my favorite narrative device -- at the end, all the loose threads come together, including something that seemed so unimportant -- "the Shot." You find out why the book included so many references to Johnny and Owen practicing "the Shot." And the book ends with Owen using "the Shot" to save a group of Vietnamese orphans.
So there you have it -- Vietnamese orphans, a feeling that one is destined to go to Vietnam, and poignant meditations on faith and fate. I didn't name Owen after Owen Meany, absolutely not, but I remembered the book after we put "Owen" on the short list, and it all just seemed to fit.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Toddler Adoption Rocks
We've been home for a week and two days. In some ways, it feels like we just got back; in other ways, it feels like we left Vietnam a month ago. Our days are so chock-full.
Owen is doing great. He's a different kid every day, getting more and more comfortable with his surroundings and with us.
In the past week, he's:
- Had his first Maryland blue crabs -- but perhaps not his first crabs. He was sucking meat out of cracked claws like he'd been doing it all his life.
- Learned to blow kisses. Grandma was a goner on that one.
- Visited Norm's Beer & Wine, where his parents found Tiger Beer, which they enjoyed so much in Vietnam, and he enjoyed his first Old Dominion Brewery product (don't worry -- root beer).
- Been to Target -- three times.
- Started sleeping more through the night and having fewer night terrors.
- Learned to love bath time.
- Started playing jokes on Mom, like jumping out from behind the car, or offering a bit of food and then pulling his hand away at the last second.
I'm learning to live with food on my clothing at all times, constant backache from picking him up and putting him down 367 times a day, and very little sleep, but I wouldn't have it any other way. There are times when I'm positively giddy with happiness.
I can't believe I was ever concerned about adopting a toddler instead of an infant -- you get to so much good stuff right away. I love watching him figure something out, even if it's how to get into something he shouldn't be getting into or how to work the Tivo remote. I love hearing him pick up new words -- he got "moon" right away last night. I love how he threads his arm through mine when I pick him up. He laughs a lot, and it's the best sound ever.
He's come such a long ways from the frightened little boy he was just a few weeks ago. He hardly seems like the same kid.
Ha Long Bay Slide Show
We visited a beautiful area of Vietnam called Ha Long Bay - sometimes called the Eighth Wonder of the World, Lots of photos were taken, enough for a slideshow. Enjoy all 50 plus.
The photos are from the two days we visited. One the second day it rained very hard for a couple of hours which created some very dramatic shots. Besides the water scenes you'll also see the caves. It was a real trek up there carrying Owen and watching the slippery steps. Bonnie blogged about this earlier.
The photos are from the two days we visited. One the second day it rained very hard for a couple of hours which created some very dramatic shots. Besides the water scenes you'll also see the caves. It was a real trek up there carrying Owen and watching the slippery steps. Bonnie blogged about this earlier.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Got the Pronunciation!
BIG thank-you to Titi! She helped me learn to finally pronounce "Loc" correctly today. Now, I can say it, and Owen Loc gets a huge smile on his face and laughs at me. It's so cool. Before, he wouldn't recognize my botched pronunciation at all.
Owen had his first playdate today, with Danny Phi and Brian, and moms Titi and Cilla. Then we all went to lunch at Udupi Palace, where Owen chowed down on Indian food. He had a great time on the playground equipment, but it was a big day with a lot of new faces. He slept most of the afternoon, and then watched the Olympics opening ceremonies with us. He started singing during the Chinese national anthem. He didn't actually sing the anthem itself-- that would have been wild -- but just his own song. Who knows, maybe it was his national anthem.
While I want to keep getting Owen used to his own name, now I want to call him Loc as much as I can so I retain the pronunciation, and to see that little smile. I hope I'm not confusing him! I've tried using "Owen Loc" all afternoon.
Owen had his first playdate today, with Danny Phi and Brian, and moms Titi and Cilla. Then we all went to lunch at Udupi Palace, where Owen chowed down on Indian food. He had a great time on the playground equipment, but it was a big day with a lot of new faces. He slept most of the afternoon, and then watched the Olympics opening ceremonies with us. He started singing during the Chinese national anthem. He didn't actually sing the anthem itself-- that would have been wild -- but just his own song. Who knows, maybe it was his national anthem.
While I want to keep getting Owen used to his own name, now I want to call him Loc as much as I can so I retain the pronunciation, and to see that little smile. I hope I'm not confusing him! I've tried using "Owen Loc" all afternoon.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
It's Sunny in Mommyland
Last night went MUCH better, and today has been an absolute delight. We did a couple things to help with Owen's transition.
We kept the lights on in his room all night. He slept in there part of the night, part of the night with one of us holding him, but at least he slept, with no screaming hysterics. He was still up from 2 to 4 having dinner, but it was a vast improvement over the past two nights. He didn't get up till 8:15 this morning.
We kept things low-key today. We left the house a couple times, but didn't have any visitors or otherwise intense situations. Okay, we did take him to Toys 'R Us, which he LOVED. Grandma and Pop-Pop, head's up. We were desperate; he's obsessed with phones and has figured out how to get various sounds by pushing buttons on my cell (he called Aunt Gail today) and the land-line. And once he gets one in his hand, you can't get it away from him, so we went out and got him a Fischer-Price toy one that does the alphabet and counting and songs.
But all in all, today was a great day. He was a happy, affectionate kid today, with a good appetite. He took a long bath and loved playing with his bath toys. He was charming and well-behaved and just wonderful all day, and went to be at his pre-trip bedtime of 7:30.
I'm trying to decide about continuing this blog, which I started primarily to document the adoption process and trip. I don't want it to degenerate into "Owen did the cutest thing today...." zzzzzz. ALL kids are cute, and it seems self-indulgent if that's what it starts being.
But I do want to keep writing about the transition, and I have some things I want to write about Vietnam and what an amazing experience it was to be there. So, we'll see. Maybe the blog will evolve into something else when I've wrapped up those two threads.
Or maybe I'll just be a typical smitten and besotted mom and fill up the blogosphere with posts on "Owen did the cutest thing today"....
We kept the lights on in his room all night. He slept in there part of the night, part of the night with one of us holding him, but at least he slept, with no screaming hysterics. He was still up from 2 to 4 having dinner, but it was a vast improvement over the past two nights. He didn't get up till 8:15 this morning.
We kept things low-key today. We left the house a couple times, but didn't have any visitors or otherwise intense situations. Okay, we did take him to Toys 'R Us, which he LOVED. Grandma and Pop-Pop, head's up. We were desperate; he's obsessed with phones and has figured out how to get various sounds by pushing buttons on my cell (he called Aunt Gail today) and the land-line. And once he gets one in his hand, you can't get it away from him, so we went out and got him a Fischer-Price toy one that does the alphabet and counting and songs.
But all in all, today was a great day. He was a happy, affectionate kid today, with a good appetite. He took a long bath and loved playing with his bath toys. He was charming and well-behaved and just wonderful all day, and went to be at his pre-trip bedtime of 7:30.
I'm trying to decide about continuing this blog, which I started primarily to document the adoption process and trip. I don't want it to degenerate into "Owen did the cutest thing today...." zzzzzz. ALL kids are cute, and it seems self-indulgent if that's what it starts being.
But I do want to keep writing about the transition, and I have some things I want to write about Vietnam and what an amazing experience it was to be there. So, we'll see. Maybe the blog will evolve into something else when I've wrapped up those two threads.
Or maybe I'll just be a typical smitten and besotted mom and fill up the blogosphere with posts on "Owen did the cutest thing today"....
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Rocky Start
We're still sleepwalking. The jet lag is pretty awful. We've had only a couple hours of sleep the past two nights. Owen Loc is really struggling with his new environment, so many new faces, and his own jet lag. The first night home was tough, but last night he pulled an all-nighter of terrified screaming with some sleep but only on our laps, plus a 3 a.m. binge-eating session.
I know we're asking a lot of the little guy, and we've probably overdone it with introducing him to his new family, but we've also come to hypothesize that he's terrified of the dark. Our hotel room in Phan Thiet was all teak and poorly lit, and he was frightened every time we set foot in there. He did much better in Saigon and Hanoi. Here at home, it's a lot darker than the hotel rooms we were staying in with all the city ambient light. Last night, he was screaming and signaling to me to take him outside, and when I opened the blinds to show him it was nighttime and not a good idea, he visibly flinched at the dark.
So tonight we tried putting him to bed with all the lights on in his room, instead of just a nightlight, and he didn't go into convulsions when his head hit the pillow. Of course, that was only 15 minutes ago. Last night, we got a whole 20 minutes out of him sleeping in his room before we had to give up and take turns holding him while he slept.
So, we're dead tired but having fun. Thanks to the required classes we had to take before adopting and all the reading we've done, and all the other adoptive families we've met who shared their own homecoming tales with us, we were prepared for rough days. In many ways, it's better than we expected, because when he's rested and well-fed (and his appetite is definitely improving), he's a complete joy. He's a very happy, very active little boy who will run into my arms and give me a kiss. He loves playing in the water, and taking toys or blocks out of a container and putting them back in. Tonight he helped me put all the bottles that had accumulated into the recycle bin. He's even getting used to the car seat, and he spent a good portion of today without shoes on -- a major accomplishment, since shoes are one of his comfort items.
Ray uploaded all of his photos today -- all 1500 of them. We promise we'll do some editing before sharing the link. There are some great ones there that really capture what Vietnam is like.
While I happy to be drinking drinks with ice again, and I had a cheeseburger on the grill last night that tasted like heaven, I am missing the food in Vietnam. It's just amazing.
I'm hoping for an easier night and a happier day tomorrow. We're being patient and trying to help Owen through this rough time. We get enough smiles from him to get us through this patch.
I know we're asking a lot of the little guy, and we've probably overdone it with introducing him to his new family, but we've also come to hypothesize that he's terrified of the dark. Our hotel room in Phan Thiet was all teak and poorly lit, and he was frightened every time we set foot in there. He did much better in Saigon and Hanoi. Here at home, it's a lot darker than the hotel rooms we were staying in with all the city ambient light. Last night, he was screaming and signaling to me to take him outside, and when I opened the blinds to show him it was nighttime and not a good idea, he visibly flinched at the dark.
So tonight we tried putting him to bed with all the lights on in his room, instead of just a nightlight, and he didn't go into convulsions when his head hit the pillow. Of course, that was only 15 minutes ago. Last night, we got a whole 20 minutes out of him sleeping in his room before we had to give up and take turns holding him while he slept.
So, we're dead tired but having fun. Thanks to the required classes we had to take before adopting and all the reading we've done, and all the other adoptive families we've met who shared their own homecoming tales with us, we were prepared for rough days. In many ways, it's better than we expected, because when he's rested and well-fed (and his appetite is definitely improving), he's a complete joy. He's a very happy, very active little boy who will run into my arms and give me a kiss. He loves playing in the water, and taking toys or blocks out of a container and putting them back in. Tonight he helped me put all the bottles that had accumulated into the recycle bin. He's even getting used to the car seat, and he spent a good portion of today without shoes on -- a major accomplishment, since shoes are one of his comfort items.
Ray uploaded all of his photos today -- all 1500 of them. We promise we'll do some editing before sharing the link. There are some great ones there that really capture what Vietnam is like.
While I happy to be drinking drinks with ice again, and I had a cheeseburger on the grill last night that tasted like heaven, I am missing the food in Vietnam. It's just amazing.
I'm hoping for an easier night and a happier day tomorrow. We're being patient and trying to help Owen through this rough time. We get enough smiles from him to get us through this patch.
Monday, August 4, 2008
Home at Last, and the Name
We made it home, as the pictures below show. Somewhere over Chicago I nearly freaked out thinking I could not stand one more minute on an airplane. And this was with a sleeping, angelic child on my lap. The San Francisco to Dulles leg was way better. Loc ran around SFO so much that he crashed right after his take-off bottle and didn't wake up until we were taxi-ing to the gate at Dulles.
We were met at the airport by my parents and niece, Renee, and nephew, Scott. It was so great to see them and to be home.
The first few minutes of the ride home were rough. Poor Loc has never been in a car seat and has gotten quite used to sitting on Mommy's lap during the many long car rides in Vietnam. We strapped him in and had hysterics all down the Dulles expressway. He couldn't understand why he was being restrained and kept screaming to get out to sit on my lap. We finally distracted him enough that he calmed down.
He's been in a great mood all day. He's been exploring his new home, playing with his toys, playing in the backyard, and generally being charming with his delighted grandparents. Ray and I are barely sleepwalking through the day -- the jet lag coming back is MUCH worse than going over. Loc shows no signs of fading, although right now he's on his second nap. He just has too much to do and see and experience.
(Speaking of which, last night in the airport we had a pre-flight beer and ordered him a glass of water. It came with ice, which we believe he had never seen before. He kept putting his hands in the glass and fishing out cubes and crowing with fascination, to the point where his whole body was shaking, he was so cold. But he couldn't get over these cool things floating his his water.)
So...his name. While in Vietnam we settled on Owen Loc. Owen was one of our choices because it retains some of the sounds of his last name, Nguyen (pronounced n'win), and had he stayed in Vietnam, he would have been called Nguyen Loc, as the custom is to do last name first. After meeting him, we decided Owen fit him.
He knows his name now and responds to it. We started calling him Owen in Vietnam because try as we might, we simply cannot pronounce Loc in a way that he understands. You'd think it would be easy, but it's not. We'd call him Loc, and he'd never even turn his head. When Vietnamese people we met there asked us his name, and we'd say, "Loc," they'd look at us blankly, and we'd have to spell it. "Oh, Loc," they'd say. To our Western ears, we could never hear the subtle distinction in pronunciation. I can't figure out how to do the diacritical marks in Blogger, but the o has two -- the little hat on top and a dot underneath. This means, we've been told, your voice has to go up and down on the o, but in a lower register.
English is obviously not a tonal language like Vietnamese, because we tried really hard to learn how to get that o right, but we're hopeless. We're not going to give up, because we're retaining Loc as his middle name and we want to pronounce it correctly.
Luckily, he seems to like "Owen" just fine.
It's so good to be home finally. Words just can't express it, but I'll write more when I'm more awake.
We were met at the airport by my parents and niece, Renee, and nephew, Scott. It was so great to see them and to be home.
The first few minutes of the ride home were rough. Poor Loc has never been in a car seat and has gotten quite used to sitting on Mommy's lap during the many long car rides in Vietnam. We strapped him in and had hysterics all down the Dulles expressway. He couldn't understand why he was being restrained and kept screaming to get out to sit on my lap. We finally distracted him enough that he calmed down.
He's been in a great mood all day. He's been exploring his new home, playing with his toys, playing in the backyard, and generally being charming with his delighted grandparents. Ray and I are barely sleepwalking through the day -- the jet lag coming back is MUCH worse than going over. Loc shows no signs of fading, although right now he's on his second nap. He just has too much to do and see and experience.
(Speaking of which, last night in the airport we had a pre-flight beer and ordered him a glass of water. It came with ice, which we believe he had never seen before. He kept putting his hands in the glass and fishing out cubes and crowing with fascination, to the point where his whole body was shaking, he was so cold. But he couldn't get over these cool things floating his his water.)
So...his name. While in Vietnam we settled on Owen Loc. Owen was one of our choices because it retains some of the sounds of his last name, Nguyen (pronounced n'win), and had he stayed in Vietnam, he would have been called Nguyen Loc, as the custom is to do last name first. After meeting him, we decided Owen fit him.
He knows his name now and responds to it. We started calling him Owen in Vietnam because try as we might, we simply cannot pronounce Loc in a way that he understands. You'd think it would be easy, but it's not. We'd call him Loc, and he'd never even turn his head. When Vietnamese people we met there asked us his name, and we'd say, "Loc," they'd look at us blankly, and we'd have to spell it. "Oh, Loc," they'd say. To our Western ears, we could never hear the subtle distinction in pronunciation. I can't figure out how to do the diacritical marks in Blogger, but the o has two -- the little hat on top and a dot underneath. This means, we've been told, your voice has to go up and down on the o, but in a lower register.
English is obviously not a tonal language like Vietnamese, because we tried really hard to learn how to get that o right, but we're hopeless. We're not going to give up, because we're retaining Loc as his middle name and we want to pronounce it correctly.
Luckily, he seems to like "Owen" just fine.
It's so good to be home finally. Words just can't express it, but I'll write more when I'm more awake.
Home In My Room
Bonnie is sitting with Owen on his bed in his room. Renee - Owen's new best friend - introduces him to many new toys..
Owen is Greeted By His Family
Owen, Bonnie and I had a wonderful reception at the airport from Grandma, PopPop, Scott and Renee. The later three are just above Owen's head in this picture.
Off the Plane
We were so glad to be off that awful United Airlines flight and to be home in the DC area again. Owen is in Mom's arms as we head through the main terminal to baggage claim to awaiting family.
But what time is it? What day? The jet lag and the 36 hours of traveling took its toll.
But what time is it? What day? The jet lag and the 36 hours of traveling took its toll.
Owen Meets His Big Brother
Red made a great impression on Owen right from the start. What a great big brother!
Brothers need to share. So Red is giving Owen a bite of a Teddy Graham. You'll have to see the video to hear all of the giggles and see all the fun they were having.
Later in the airport, I'd put Owen down and tell him to "run to Red" and off he'd go. Red would have his arms outstretched and "catch" Owen lifting him up high and then to his chest.
Many other geat moments in SFO and more to come between brothers.
Brothers need to share. So Red is giving Owen a bite of a Teddy Graham. You'll have to see the video to hear all of the giggles and see all the fun they were having.
Later in the airport, I'd put Owen down and tell him to "run to Red" and off he'd go. Red would have his arms outstretched and "catch" Owen lifting him up high and then to his chest.
Many other geat moments in SFO and more to come between brothers.
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Ice Cream Boy
Everybody likes ice cream. What Bonnie didn't know when she was doing her post last night is that we got a second order of coconut ice cream while we waited for her blogging. Loc just chomped right through the first bowl before I could hardly get a bite. There is nothing to worry about his appetite.
We've been having trouble getting Loc to eat from the stroller, so he sits on a lap to eat most of the time. This means one or the other leaning across the table to offer more food. His appetite varies from day to day fairly widely, so it has been a challenge on that front. Also, he is very 'hands on', as you might expect. So it makes for a mess in our laps and on our shirts/tops, but he is eating well and only some time into the meal does he start to play. It is also hard to tell how much he is eating because if he gets too much in his mouth he like to share. We trying to get him off the formula bottle for nutrition.
On the next leg of the plane ride we'll have in our laps. More feeding from airline trays. But we brought alone 'Bag-O-Snacks' with goldfish like crackers, Teddy Grams and a few other treats. These have worked out great. More to pull out for this leg and I'll have to do my best to make sure he does not grab the bag and dump in in our seats.
We'll see how it does the next 14 hours. How much sleep? How much crying? How much game playing? Just thinking about this future is putting a smile on my face.
You'll see Loc soon. We'll let you know how this leg went. I'll get more pictures posted when we get home - no facility to do it here.
We've been having trouble getting Loc to eat from the stroller, so he sits on a lap to eat most of the time. This means one or the other leaning across the table to offer more food. His appetite varies from day to day fairly widely, so it has been a challenge on that front. Also, he is very 'hands on', as you might expect. So it makes for a mess in our laps and on our shirts/tops, but he is eating well and only some time into the meal does he start to play. It is also hard to tell how much he is eating because if he gets too much in his mouth he like to share. We trying to get him off the formula bottle for nutrition.
On the next leg of the plane ride we'll have in our laps. More feeding from airline trays. But we brought alone 'Bag-O-Snacks' with goldfish like crackers, Teddy Grams and a few other treats. These have worked out great. More to pull out for this leg and I'll have to do my best to make sure he does not grab the bag and dump in in our seats.
We'll see how it does the next 14 hours. How much sleep? How much crying? How much game playing? Just thinking about this future is putting a smile on my face.
You'll see Loc soon. We'll let you know how this leg went. I'll get more pictures posted when we get home - no facility to do it here.
In Transit with Chucky
We've made it to Taipei.
Wow, a whole 3.5 hours into our trip.
Loc woke up on the wrong side of the crib this morning and has pretty much screamed nonstop until we were halfway across the South China Sea. Nothing is making him happy right now. We've got an almost-4-hour layover here, so I hope he perks up and is in a better mood for the next leg. Otherwise, we might dump him with Red in San Francisco and come on home by ourselves.
Just kidding!
Our airport taxi was 15 minutes late this morning, causing me conniptions, but the driver drove like a maniac and we got to the airport just after another family who left 15 minutes earlier. Our last views of Hanoi were blurs accompanied by horns.
So far, everything's on schedule, so we should be arriving in San Francisco at 4 p.m. on Sunday. Which is weird because it's 4 p.m. on Sunday right now. We lose 12 hours, poof, just like that.
Okay, my bags are unattended outside the Internet room because Ray is off with Loc dealing with a meltdown, so I have to run. See you all very soon.
Wow, a whole 3.5 hours into our trip.
Loc woke up on the wrong side of the crib this morning and has pretty much screamed nonstop until we were halfway across the South China Sea. Nothing is making him happy right now. We've got an almost-4-hour layover here, so I hope he perks up and is in a better mood for the next leg. Otherwise, we might dump him with Red in San Francisco and come on home by ourselves.
Just kidding!
Our airport taxi was 15 minutes late this morning, causing me conniptions, but the driver drove like a maniac and we got to the airport just after another family who left 15 minutes earlier. Our last views of Hanoi were blurs accompanied by horns.
So far, everything's on schedule, so we should be arriving in San Francisco at 4 p.m. on Sunday. Which is weird because it's 4 p.m. on Sunday right now. We lose 12 hours, poof, just like that.
Okay, my bags are unattended outside the Internet room because Ray is off with Loc dealing with a meltdown, so I have to run. See you all very soon.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Last night in Hanoi
I'm sitting in Highlands Coffee, eating Vietnamese coffee cheesecake while Ray feeds Loc coconut ice cream.
We've had an exhausting day. I think I finally got the hang of bargaining and got some incredible deals today. We did a couple trips out to the lake and shopping districts, then an afternoon at the pool. Poor Loc is totally off his schedule, but since we're starting a 23-hour trip tomorrow morning, maybe it's for the best.
We were going to try to go to a water puppet show today, but we got to the theatre and the next show was in 90 minutes, and it was just too hot to wait. So, we made our way back to the pool and hung out there.
One thing I haven't mentioned is how we feel like celebrities every time we're out. Not only do we get stared at, but people come up to us constantly and want to touch Loc or hold him. They even kiss him sometimes,and they always talk to him in Vietnamese and are delighted when he responds with a smile. They always ask if he's Vietnamese, and how old is, and where we're from. And then they usually express gratitude for our adopting a Vietnamese child, or they tell us how lucky Loc is and wish us much happiness and good fortune.
This especially happens in restaurants, where we spend a lot of our time. No eye-rolling of "Oh crap, they brought a child in here." Instead, they bend over backwards for us and sometimes even want to play with Loc or hold him while we eat. And the other customers all smile at us and wave. This is not like America. Tonight at this fabulous Vietnamese restaurant Loc was sleeping in his stroller, and I thought the waitstaff was going to wake him up, they kept wanting to touch him and pinch his cheeks.
So head's up, everyone. This is the kind of attention he has come to expect. Please do your best to continue his perception that he's a celebrity.
Ha ha.
Anyways, don't know if I'll write another blog entry in the morning before we leave, but I'll try to check in from the Taipei airport. And then we'll be HOME, and you'll all get to meet this amazing little boy.
Love to all, and see you soon!!
We've had an exhausting day. I think I finally got the hang of bargaining and got some incredible deals today. We did a couple trips out to the lake and shopping districts, then an afternoon at the pool. Poor Loc is totally off his schedule, but since we're starting a 23-hour trip tomorrow morning, maybe it's for the best.
We were going to try to go to a water puppet show today, but we got to the theatre and the next show was in 90 minutes, and it was just too hot to wait. So, we made our way back to the pool and hung out there.
One thing I haven't mentioned is how we feel like celebrities every time we're out. Not only do we get stared at, but people come up to us constantly and want to touch Loc or hold him. They even kiss him sometimes,and they always talk to him in Vietnamese and are delighted when he responds with a smile. They always ask if he's Vietnamese, and how old is, and where we're from. And then they usually express gratitude for our adopting a Vietnamese child, or they tell us how lucky Loc is and wish us much happiness and good fortune.
This especially happens in restaurants, where we spend a lot of our time. No eye-rolling of "Oh crap, they brought a child in here." Instead, they bend over backwards for us and sometimes even want to play with Loc or hold him while we eat. And the other customers all smile at us and wave. This is not like America. Tonight at this fabulous Vietnamese restaurant Loc was sleeping in his stroller, and I thought the waitstaff was going to wake him up, they kept wanting to touch him and pinch his cheeks.
So head's up, everyone. This is the kind of attention he has come to expect. Please do your best to continue his perception that he's a celebrity.
Ha ha.
Anyways, don't know if I'll write another blog entry in the morning before we leave, but I'll try to check in from the Taipei airport. And then we'll be HOME, and you'll all get to meet this amazing little boy.
Love to all, and see you soon!!
Friday, August 1, 2008
Halong till we get back to Hanoi?
Well.
THAT was an adventure.
We made it back to Hanoi yesterday afternoon, in the rain, crammed in a 14-person van with babies on our laps on the bumpiest roads yet. All we wanted when we got back here was room service and a hot shower.
Halong Bay is beautiful. (Ray will try to upload photos later today if we can borrow Dan's laptop; otherwise, we'll post them when we get home.) It really is something to see.
But the trip...I guess it was about what we expected, but we didn't know that "deluxe" included cockroaches.
The ship, or junk, was very quaint but definitely not up to American safety codes, and Loc has really come out of his shell, so I spent the whole trip chasing him around the deck and keeping him from getting too close to the railing.
We set sail on a really hot morning, and after an hour and a half, we disembarked along with dozens of other boats, at one of the rock formations, which has a cave. One of the dads stayed on the boat with sleeping baby Nina, but the rest of us trekked onshore and then started a vertical hike up the side of the rock with babies on our backs in hellacious heat.
The cave was really cool -- better than Luray -- but not well lit on the paths, and slippery, and oh, about 120 degrees inside. We'd be winding our way through these narrow slippery paths into the belly of the cave, making plans to spot each other if someone slipped and dropped a baby. But amazing rock formations.
When we descended back to the shoreline, it was "high tide," they told us, so we had to wade through knee-deep water on the little boardwalk back to the boat. And the junks were so crammed in to the dock area that you had to duck under bows. As we were wading and dealing with wriggling kids, one boat crashed right through the dock railing in front of us. Then we had a climb a ladder made out of pipe to get back on the boat.
It was hilarious. In its own screwed-up way.
Then we tooled around the bay some more with stops for kayaking (Ray did it) and swimming (no one did, given the amount of diesel dumped in the bay by all these junks, the boat traffic, and the garbage).
The food on board was okay but not great, the crew not that interested in giving us a tour, but the cabins were actually pretty roomy -- two twin beds and plenty of room to move around. And largish private bathrooms with showers.
Oh, except that I'm forgetting the cockroaches. Yes, in the bed, on the walls, generally enjoying their cruise on Halong Bay as well. One family's room was a little more infested than the others', which led to The Best Line of the Trip.
When Lu complained to one of the crew about the roaches in her room and how did they expect her to sleep in there with her baby, the crewman said, "Oh, don't worry Madame. As soon as the AC comes on and we cut the engines, they run right to the kitchen."
Nice.
So, that family passed the night wearing bandanas over their ears, socks tucked into pants, 3 or 4 layers, and a tent made out of a sheet. And all the lights on. We only saw a few roaches in our room and were so exhausted we didn't worry about it. I was more worried about Loc getting out of the room in the middle of the night, so despite double-bolting and chain locking the door, I slept with my hand around Houdini's ankle.
The next day, it rained all day, which gave the rock formations a mystical, ethereal quality, like we were in some enchanted Tolkien land. I'm joking, of course. It was pretty miserable on board, we could only look out windows, the crew was watching TV instead of giving us a tour, breakfast was inedible (although I didn't see any roaches in my "omelet"). All we wanted to do was get back to Hanoi at that point.
We got back to Halong Harbor, had to walk a few blocks in the rain with all of our luggage
to a restaurant for lunch -- this time, really crappy tourist food -- then crammed in the van with 8 other people for the three-hour ride back to Hanoi.
We were all glad we did this excursion -- roaches and all, because it makes for a good story and it really was something to see -- but the Somerset with its Soviet-era decorating style was looking pretty good.
Also, while Loc was generally well-behaved if a bit energetic for a boat, there was an incident with him. He bit me, twice. One just looks like a hickey on my shoulder, but the other one actually broke the skin. I don't know what to make of this -- he wasn't angry or upset. He was just rough-housing with me -- jumping up in my arms and bonking his head against me, which he loves to do, and then he just CHOMPED.
This has led to his new nickname, Chucky, among our group.
The second time he did it, in the van on the way back, I yelled, "No," and pushed him off of me, which led to a really amazing tantrum with huge tears and screams that thankfully had everyone in the van laughing at the theatrics. So we'll see if he got the message.
Today's our last day in Hanoi, then we leave early tomorrow for the airport. Finally!! I can't wait to get on that plane to come home. Today we're going to visit the Hanoi Hilton to see John McCain's cell, and we're going to the Old Quarter for some last-minute souvenir shopping.
I can't believe we're finally ready to leave Vietnam. It has truly been amazing. This blog doesn't cover half of the sights and things we've experienced. We've been on sensory overload since we touched down in Saigon two weeks ago.
Now I'm off to meet my boys for breakfast, then out into the traffic and noise of Hanoi.
THAT was an adventure.
We made it back to Hanoi yesterday afternoon, in the rain, crammed in a 14-person van with babies on our laps on the bumpiest roads yet. All we wanted when we got back here was room service and a hot shower.
Halong Bay is beautiful. (Ray will try to upload photos later today if we can borrow Dan's laptop; otherwise, we'll post them when we get home.) It really is something to see.
But the trip...I guess it was about what we expected, but we didn't know that "deluxe" included cockroaches.
The ship, or junk, was very quaint but definitely not up to American safety codes, and Loc has really come out of his shell, so I spent the whole trip chasing him around the deck and keeping him from getting too close to the railing.
We set sail on a really hot morning, and after an hour and a half, we disembarked along with dozens of other boats, at one of the rock formations, which has a cave. One of the dads stayed on the boat with sleeping baby Nina, but the rest of us trekked onshore and then started a vertical hike up the side of the rock with babies on our backs in hellacious heat.
The cave was really cool -- better than Luray -- but not well lit on the paths, and slippery, and oh, about 120 degrees inside. We'd be winding our way through these narrow slippery paths into the belly of the cave, making plans to spot each other if someone slipped and dropped a baby. But amazing rock formations.
When we descended back to the shoreline, it was "high tide," they told us, so we had to wade through knee-deep water on the little boardwalk back to the boat. And the junks were so crammed in to the dock area that you had to duck under bows. As we were wading and dealing with wriggling kids, one boat crashed right through the dock railing in front of us. Then we had a climb a ladder made out of pipe to get back on the boat.
It was hilarious. In its own screwed-up way.
Then we tooled around the bay some more with stops for kayaking (Ray did it) and swimming (no one did, given the amount of diesel dumped in the bay by all these junks, the boat traffic, and the garbage).
The food on board was okay but not great, the crew not that interested in giving us a tour, but the cabins were actually pretty roomy -- two twin beds and plenty of room to move around. And largish private bathrooms with showers.
Oh, except that I'm forgetting the cockroaches. Yes, in the bed, on the walls, generally enjoying their cruise on Halong Bay as well. One family's room was a little more infested than the others', which led to The Best Line of the Trip.
When Lu complained to one of the crew about the roaches in her room and how did they expect her to sleep in there with her baby, the crewman said, "Oh, don't worry Madame. As soon as the AC comes on and we cut the engines, they run right to the kitchen."
Nice.
So, that family passed the night wearing bandanas over their ears, socks tucked into pants, 3 or 4 layers, and a tent made out of a sheet. And all the lights on. We only saw a few roaches in our room and were so exhausted we didn't worry about it. I was more worried about Loc getting out of the room in the middle of the night, so despite double-bolting and chain locking the door, I slept with my hand around Houdini's ankle.
The next day, it rained all day, which gave the rock formations a mystical, ethereal quality, like we were in some enchanted Tolkien land. I'm joking, of course. It was pretty miserable on board, we could only look out windows, the crew was watching TV instead of giving us a tour, breakfast was inedible (although I didn't see any roaches in my "omelet"). All we wanted to do was get back to Hanoi at that point.
We got back to Halong Harbor, had to walk a few blocks in the rain with all of our luggage
to a restaurant for lunch -- this time, really crappy tourist food -- then crammed in the van with 8 other people for the three-hour ride back to Hanoi.
We were all glad we did this excursion -- roaches and all, because it makes for a good story and it really was something to see -- but the Somerset with its Soviet-era decorating style was looking pretty good.
Also, while Loc was generally well-behaved if a bit energetic for a boat, there was an incident with him. He bit me, twice. One just looks like a hickey on my shoulder, but the other one actually broke the skin. I don't know what to make of this -- he wasn't angry or upset. He was just rough-housing with me -- jumping up in my arms and bonking his head against me, which he loves to do, and then he just CHOMPED.
This has led to his new nickname, Chucky, among our group.
The second time he did it, in the van on the way back, I yelled, "No," and pushed him off of me, which led to a really amazing tantrum with huge tears and screams that thankfully had everyone in the van laughing at the theatrics. So we'll see if he got the message.
Today's our last day in Hanoi, then we leave early tomorrow for the airport. Finally!! I can't wait to get on that plane to come home. Today we're going to visit the Hanoi Hilton to see John McCain's cell, and we're going to the Old Quarter for some last-minute souvenir shopping.
I can't believe we're finally ready to leave Vietnam. It has truly been amazing. This blog doesn't cover half of the sights and things we've experienced. We've been on sensory overload since we touched down in Saigon two weeks ago.
Now I'm off to meet my boys for breakfast, then out into the traffic and noise of Hanoi.
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